Jessica Simpson may be a hulking bright orange man-jawed talent vacuum - but at least she's a hulking bright orange man-jawed talent vacuum who makes the news when she splits up with people, which is more than any of us can say for you.
It's been rumoured that Jessica Simpson - former professional idiot and performer of films and songs you couldn't even consider liking - has apparently split up with her boyfriend, the equally vapid blues-lite musician John Mayer. This earth-shattering split hasn't been confirmed by either Jessica Simpson or John Mayer yet, but enough sources have reported it for us to assume that it's probably true. What's the point of reporting a speculative rumour about Jessica Simpson's private life, you ask? Well, it's a quiet news day and it's either this or we write about Jessica Simpson's crappy new film. Which would you prefer?
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